"Once upon a time in the middle of winter, when the flakes of snow were falling like feathers from the sky, a queen sat at a window sewing … she pricked her finger with the needle and three drops of blood fell upon the snow... she had a little daughter, who was as white as snow, as red as blood, and her hair as black as ebony, and she was called little Snow White."
Traditional fairy tales such as Snow White (1812), were often full of dark deeds and macabre endings. In the original Grimm’s tale, the Queen makes a gruesome request for Snow White to be killed and her liver and lungs to be brought back for dinner that night. Contemporary versions have been Disneyfied into far less violent, sugar sweet, happy ever after stories.
The annual King’s Theatre pantomime once again adapts a favourite fairy tale with a modern Scottified script: take Snow White’s period setting and key characters, blend briskly with topical jokes, lashings of malicious madness, song and dance and spellbinding stage effects.
Here are all the ingredients to create a thickly iced and spiced Christmas cake of a family show, especially crafted to entertain all ages.
The trio of panto stars, back together again, are Allan Stewart as the Dame (the buxom, bawdy Nurse May), Andy Gray in his typical gormless role as a Palace servant, Hector, and Grant Stott as Queen Sadista, the scarily sadistic Wicked Stepmother.
With all the business of narrating the plot - village dancers, Snow White celebrating her 21st birthday with childhood sweetheart, Prince Hamish, the jealously evil Queen – it sets off at a slow pace.
But with a flurry of humorous scenes, peppered throughout with local Edinburgh jokes (Hibs, Hearts, Mary Erksine school, Sturgeon and Salmond), it soon speeds into top gear.
Much of the hilarity is down to farcical silliness: Andy Gray pronouncing the word “banana” dozens of times with an elongated drawl and a quick firing tongue twister, Three Smart Fellows, as we wait for them to trip up with the expected "Fart Smellow".
Grant Stott has played many evil villains over recent years, including a menacing Captain Hook. Towering about 7 feet tall in heels, a lavish purple gown and gold crown with immaculate make up and ruby red lips, his portrayal of Queen Sadista is outrageously, extravagantly fabulous.
With a sneering, haughty manner she desperately seeks reassurance of her beauty, "Looking-glass, looking-glass on the wall, Who in this land is the fairest of all?" Her deep throated growling as she plots revenge on Snow White is greeted by high pitched boos from the audience.
The Seven Dwarfs are played by average-sized actors, gallantly charging around on their knees under flowing cloaks like an army regiment of little soldiers. Their Dolls’s House cottage with seven wee chairs and beds is so cute as is a charming scene when they arrive home riding a squirrel, rabbit, badger and other super furry animals.
Frances Mayli McCann is a perfectly lovely Snow White, who has found the perfect romantic match in Prince Hamish, aka the handsome Greg Barrowman. Like his cousin John B, he has distinctive musical theatre talent (more songs please).
Theatrical and visual effects are quite literally magical (no plot spoiler here), but just wait until you see Rudolph's Sleigh and the Wicked Queen’s pet T-Rex.
With all the usual colourful costumes and sets, this sparkling show will get you in festive mood, complete with a wonderful reworking of the Twelve Days of Christmas: “12 Christmas crackers, 11 Evening Newses, 10 Tartan Tammies,... and a fairy for the top of the tree.”
This fast-paced routine shows off the ad-libbing, laugh a minute, comic genius of Barrowman, Stewart, Gray and Stott brilliantly. I guarantee you will be singing this new version on your way home and the classic song about swans, hens, doves and partridges will never be quite the same again.
Show times:
28 November, 2015 - 17 January, 2016